Do I have the best child?

The best parents are the parents who don’t have any children and the ideal children are the children you imagined when you didn’t have children yet.

What I am writing here might seem like complete nonsense, however, I'd like to illustrate the gap between expectations and reality.

How did you imagine yourself as a parent before having children? How did you imagine your ideal child? Before having children, life seemed very simple. You were able to do what you wanted when you wanted. Remember the last minute drinks, restaurants or cheap and quiet holidays (because you were off-peak) .

Only one person to take into consideration or make decision for - yourself!

Then you always dreamt of a family therefore decided to have a child. Give your life a new meaning. Your friends also have children, therefore, it is the perfect time for your child to grow up with theirs. You start imagining how your child will be, making plan: which bedroom your little one is going to have? How are you going to decorate it? Where are they going to go to school? What type of school would be best for her/him? Just thinking about these make you both happy.

Everybody said this is going to be the best thing that ever happened to you.

A sublime version of you both, with all your best qualities (you rightly don't picture the negative sides) A beautiful child, caring, polite, always smiling. Loved by your friends and their children. A child you will protect while introducing her/him to the world A child with your eyes and smile, who loves the things you love to do Shares your values, plays the same games, laughs at the same jokes A child who enjoys being with you and being close to you.

You remember your own childhood and imagine how it could have been better And you want that for your own child now!

Then your child is born

And all these hopes and dreams seem to get forgotten for a while. Reality is different...

If you are a parent, you know the after “baby” is born. You are rocked by emotions that you never had before You are sleep deprived, you're unsure, you feel guilty,... Your child doesn’t want to go to bed, wake up many times in the middle of the night. Your child has big tantrums Your child doesn’t listen to when you say “no” Your child can’t sit still when on table and keep running all around, throw food when he/she doesn’t want it or doesn’t like it You child doesn’t want to bath or shower And the list goes on and on… You had an idea of how your child would be, should be but the reality is different, there is a big gap.

It may be painful at time. Being a parent is hard, but it doesn’t have to be.

Reality can be a lot better and nicer than what you're going through.Start by digging into the root of these situations, by shifting your perspective, it can be the change you need for enjoying or re-enjoying your family life.

When you're ready to explore and discover the better side of parenthood, schedule a conversation with me. If doesn't have to be so challenging.

#PerfectChild #ParentingChallenges #ManagingExpectations #BetterYou #Montessori #Parenting